Let’s Rant About Jurassic World

Warning: don’t take this too seriously

While the rest of the Jurassic Park movies had some similar flaws, this one in particular piqued my hatred the most



*deep breath* Jurassic World lovers, clear out. Now. Still here? Okay then, you brought this on yourself. 

A few thing I dislike about this movie

  1. The people who created the Indominus Rex (did I misspell that?) Are dumb. “Oh gee, what could possibly go wrong if you combine brains and brawn in a 50 foot tall bloodthirsty reptilian package. And while we’re making sure there’s no possible way to escape this mutant killing machine, why don’t we give it the powers of a chameleon, just in case we didn’t already seal the deal on our terrifying and immanent death.”
  2. The people who visit the park are dumb. NOT A SINGLE ONE OF THEM IS TERRIFIED BY AN ALLIGATOR SHARK (not entirely clear on what it is exactly) THE SIZE OF A FUCKING HOUSE, OR ANY OF THE OTHER ASSORTED CARNIVOROUS SPECIMENS WHO COULD RIP THEM TO SHREDS IN THE BLINK OF AN EYE. IS NO ONE ELSE CONCERNED BY THE MENTAL STATE OF THESE PEOPLE?!
  3. At the part where the rangers or whatever find the IR’s tracker, (and four of them get killed) Clair basically just says, “Well shit, we’re never gonna be able to open the park again.” Yep, no big deal, 4 dudes just got slaughtered, but it don’t matter, there just side characters anyways *bleh*. 

    Yeah… The rest is basically just variations of these things. I know I might be reacting a little to strongly to this, but tell me that these things don’t even drive you crazy just a tiny bit. Swear to me!

    Cheerio, off to my midafternoon dinosaur feeding

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